Hey sisters! A few days ago, I wrote about how as children of God, we have a call of repentance and holiness (read more here). When we truly become born again, we will start to be sanctified by the Holy Spirit, and strive to live an increasingly holy life as we grow in our walk with Him. When we are born again, we are made into a new creation in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17).

In this world we see people who call themselves Christians, yet are living just like everyone else in the world. Friends, this ought not to be so. Now, before I start, I am not saying that our salvation is by our works. Our salvation is by faith in what Jesus Christ did for us through His grace alone, but true saving faith will always result in good fruit or obedience to God. As I stated in my previous post, having faith that does not affect the heart, hands, mouth and mind is dead and profitless.

Sanctification is a life long process, but there are some things we can do to help eliminate sin and grow closer to God in our lives as Christian women. I have come up with 7 steps to grow in holiness & closer to Jesus that every woman of God who is serious about her faith should consider. Let’s begin! 🙂

“Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord.” – Hebrews 12:14

“Since we have these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from every defilement of body and spirit, bringing holiness to completion in the fear of God.” – 2 Corinthians 7:1

“As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, since it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.” – 1 Peter 1:14-16

7 Essential Steps to Grow in Holiness & Closer to Christ


1. Present Yourself With Modesty

“Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness- with good works.” – 1 Timothy 2:9-10

“Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” – Proverbs 31:30

“Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman without discretion.” – Proverbs 11:22

I’m starting off with modesty, because this is a must! The world we live in is quickly losing modesty amongst women. As daughters of the King, we should have no part in that, sisters! The Apostle Paul wasn’t saying that we couldn’t braid our hair or wear nice things, he was saying that should not be our priority. We are to dress with modesty and self-control. Why? Because our lives are testimonies to others, and we are to be careful about making our weaker brothers and sisters stumble as well (1 Corinthians 8:9).

Before I was saved, I used to be a girl who dressed immodestly. I was deceived into following the trends of this world, and the Lord opened my eyes to how this affected me personally and how others saw me. Ladies, a man might gawk at a woman in short-shorts and a crop top, but you know what is even more attractive? A woman who covers and respects her body and only shares her body with her husband. In Proverbs, Solomon tells us that a woman without discretion is like a gold ring in pigs snout. We can still love the body God gave us and look beautiful all the while maintaining our modesty and not showing off what we got to everyone.

We should present ourselves with modesty and self-control, not just with our clothing, but also with our makeup and jewelry. Go through your closet. Sell, donate, or throw away any clothes that are not modest (ex: crop tops, short-shorts, mini skirts, super low cut tops, short dresses, etc). It will be worth it girls, I promise you.

While on the topic of modesty, I will note that I am not a woman who is against women wearing pants. HOWEVER, we should take care that if we wear pants they are worn modestly as well. For example, I like skinny jeans, but I am careful how I style them. I always pair them with a cardigan, jacket, or long shirt that covers my behind. Some pants just don’t leave much else to the imagination, and we should take note of that. That being said, we should also be cautious about ever wearing yoga pants out in public because they are very immodest. (I personally do not wear them at all out in public.) If you do wear them, make sure to cover yourself.

Like I said, we can still look cute and keep things modest and classy, sisters. If you aren’t sure what or what not to wear, ask the Holy Spirit to guide you. He can give you wisdom to discern what is really modest or not. For more about modesty, check out my posts on why modesty is so important and wearing makeup and jewelry .

2. Stop Listening to Inappropriate Music

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” – Proverbs 4:23

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” – Philippians 4:8

Many songs that are popular these days are catchy, however, the lyrics are often filled with the glorification of sexual immorality, drugs, alcohol, selfishness, money, violence, and rebellion. It is important to remember that we are in a war, sisters. We are in a battle between the flesh and the spirit for our souls.

We are to love God with all of our heart, mind, and soul. How can we say we love Him, and then jam out to music that is glamourizing immoral sex, violence, drugs, etc. that clearly go against God? Sisters, we need to be careful about the music we choose to listen to! We are told to guard our hearts, because everything we do flows from it. Our thoughts will become our actions. For example, if you listen to music glorifying sex and getting drunk, that is what you are feeding your soul and it will make you much vulnerable to fall into sin. This is why the Bible tells us to think about lovely things that are worthy of praise, because what we think about affects the way we feel and act.

Friends, let’s rid ourselves of any inappropriate music, any music that goes against God. To read more about why the music we listen to is so important, click here.

3. Throw Out Any Inappropriate Movies & T.V Shows

“Your eye is like a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is filled with light. But when it is unhealthy, your body is filled with darkness. Make sure that the light you think you have is not actually darkness.” – Luke 11:34-35

This goes along with getting rid of inappropriate music. What we watch can fill our hearts and minds with darkness just as much or more than music does. Be wise, sisters. Be aware of what you let into your mind. Remember, there is a spiritual war going on. “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” – Ephesians 6:12

4. Cut Out Cussing & Gossip

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. ” – Ephesians 4:29

“But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.” – Colossians 3:8

“It is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.” – Matthew 15:11

“From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.” – James 3:10

This is another big one. As women of God, we should not have cuss words in our vocabulary. I understand that none of us are perfect, and there are some who might get angry or stub our toe on a piece of furniture sometimes and let a cuss word slip out (I am guilty too, sisters). However, we need to try our best to not let that happen, and we should definitely not be making a habit of using curse words. The Bible tells us over and over again that we should watch what comes out of our mouths. This also goes for crude joking, and gossiping. We shouldn’t be talking rudely about other brothers and sisters behind their backs.

On the note of using curse words, we should also not be saying “oh my God” or “Jesus Christ” as expressions because this is taking the Lord’s name in vain. The only time we should be using His name is by talking to Him, worshipping Him, praising Him, not using His name as a platform for the obscene.

Read more about the issue of cussing and taking God’s name in vain here.

Let’s be quick to listen, and slow to speak. Let’s build each other up, not tear each other down.

“I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak,” – Matthew 12:36

“To speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.” – Titus 3:2

“She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.” – Proverbs 31:26

“If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless.” – James 1:26

5. End All Sexual Immorality

“Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.” – 1 Corinthians 6:18

“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God;” – 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5

“For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.” – Ephesians 5:5

Sisters, if any of you are single or in a relationship, I understand that the struggle can be real in abstaining from sex before marriage. We’ve all been there, am I right? However, as real as it may be, don’t let the struggle weigh you down into sin. It is not worth it! The Bible tells us over and over again that those who are unrepentant in sexual immorality will not inherit the Kingdom of God. This is super important. I decided to put this on the list because unfortunately, many women are deceived these days into thinking pornography and masturbation, sex before marriage, or even homosexual relations are okay. Don’t be deceived my sisters! We’ve got to cut all of those kinds of things out of our lives if we want to truly grow in our walk with Christ.

To read more about sexual immorality, please visit this post for more on why fleeing immorality is extremely important.

6. Be Willing To Deal With Sin Radically

“If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.” – Matthew 5:29-30

In this passage, Jesus isn’t telling us to literally gouge our eyes out or cut off our hands if we sin. Rather, He is telling us that we must be willing to take drastic measures in order to not sin. This should tell us something about how serious sin is- that it would be better for us to cut off an appendage than to continue to sin. If you are struggling with sin, do whatever you have to do to not fall into it. For example, a recovering porn addict should not to use the internet in a private place, or immediately distract themselves and walk away if they find they are being tempted. We should be willing and ready to do whatever we need to in order to flee temptations.

“and take every thought captive to obey Christ,” – 2 Corinthians 10:5

“For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness.” – 1 Thessalonians 4:7

“Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” – James 4:7

“Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh.” – Galatians 5:16

Read more about repentance here.

7. Meditate on God’s Word

“This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success.” – Joshua 1:8

“I will meditate on Your precepts and fix my eyes on Your ways.” – Psalm 119:15

Reading and meditating on God’s Word is vital to our growth in holiness and our relationship with Christ. Not only does it help us grow stronger in our walk with Him, but it helps us swiftly shut down any thoughts or feelings of doubt, anxiety, depression, guilt, shame, fear, etc. If we fill our minds with God’s Word, we have no room for the enemy’s lies!

If you are like me and sometimes need something more physically engaging to really focus, try getting a sketch pad and writing out some verses, one on each paper. Write them in pen or pencil first, and then go over them with paint or a marker. Decorate the page however you like, and hang it up in your house if you’d like. I have been doing this and have found that writing it twice (first in pen then over with a marker) and hanging it up has really helped me memorize His Word and has strengthened my relationship with Him, and even the way I witness to others. I can’t even tell you how many times this is has helped me, I highly recommend it!

“All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work.” – 2 Timothy 3:16-17

“How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to Your word. With my whole heart I seek You; let me not wander from Your commandments! I have stored up Your word in my heart, that I might not sin against You.” – Psalm 119:9-11

I hope this post has blessed you, sisters! If you have any tips of your own, feel free to share them in the comments below! God bless. 🙂

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